A woman
was at her hairdresser's getting her hair styled for a trip to Rome with her
husband. She mentioned the trip to the hairdresser, who responded:
"Rome? Why would anyone want to go there? It's crowded and
dirty.
You're crazy to go to Rome. So, how are you getting there?"
"We're
taking Continental," was the reply. "We got a great rate!"
"Continental?"
exclaimed the hairdresser. "That's a terrible airline. Their planes are old, their flight attendants are ugly, and
they're always late. So, where are you staying in Rome?"
"We'll
be at this exclusive little place over on Rome's Tiber
River called Trieste."
"Don't
go any further. I know that place. Everybody thinks its gonna be something special and
exclusive, but it's really a dump, the worst hotel in the city! The rooms are small, the service is surly,
and they're overpriced. So, whatcha' doing when you get there?"
"We're
going to go to see the Vatican and we
hope to see the Pope."
"That's
rich," laughed the hairdresser. "You and a million other people trying to see him. He'll look the
size of an ant. Boy, good luck on this lousy trip of yours. You're going to need it."
A month
later, the woman again came in for a hairdo. The hairdresser asked her about her trip to Rome.
"It was
wonderful," explained the woman, "not only were we on time in one of Continental's brand new planes, but it
was overbooked and they bumped us up to first class. The food and wine were wonderful, and I had a handsome
28-year-old steward who waited on me hand and foot. And the hotel was great! They'd just finished a $5 million
remodeling job and now it's a jewel, the finest hotel in the city. They, too, were overbooked,
so they apologized and gave us their owner's suite at no extra charge!"
"Well,"
muttered the hairdresser, "that's all well and good, but I know you didn't get to see the Pope."
"Actually,
we were quite lucky, because as we toured the Vatican,
a Swiss
Guard tapped me on the shoulder, and explained that the Pope likes to meet some of the visitors, and if I'd be
so kind as to step into his private room and wait, the Pope would personally greet me. Sure enough, five minutes
later, the Pope walked through the door and shook my hand! I knelt down and he spoke a few words to me."
"Oh,
really! What'd he say?"
He said: "Where'd you get the shitty hairdo ?